How to take his place as a father from the first moments of pregnancy and after birth?
In recent years, the role of the father throughout pregnancy has changed. Before the figure of the father anchored mainly when the child was born. Today he is there from the first months of conception
It is not easy for the dad to find his place in the midst of the almost exclusive relationship between mom and baby that is built throughout the 9 months of pregnancy.
Not easy, but not impossible. The building of the relationship is slower but the involvement of the father remains essential if he wants to be able to integrate into this duo. Indeed, there are various techniques and approaches so that future dads also create this privileged bond and feel invested.
A role for the daddy before birth
The bond between the future dad and his child cannot be compared to the mother since she carries it for 9 months. However, the future dad can also get to know and bond with his child before birth.
It is important to encourage him to communicate with the baby by speaking to him through le belly while putting a hand on it to familiarize him with the sound of his voice, to feel his reactions and to feel him move.
In the same idea, the future dad is invited to accompany the future mummy in her various medical appointments such as échographies but also birth preparation appointments.
Be present during childbirth
Too often dads feel useless and excluded at birth, the whole family and doctors revolve around mother and child. Yet this day is a springboard to play his role of father by accompanying and encouraging the mother, but also by taking charge of the first minutes of the child’s life.
Some doctors suggest that the father cut the umbilical cord in order to involve him from the start. For some this act marks the taking over of this little being as a father, for others it does not yet allow to anchor in this role.
For this, the “skin to skin” makes it possible to operate the magic and create an exchange between the father and the newborn. It is about placing the baby on the father’s chest from the first moments of life so that he can exchange looks, feel their warmth and create a connection between them.
This practice also makes it possible to gently introduce a third person into the “mother-child” relationship to build and share the family experience.
It is through the sharing of daily actions that the father-child relationship will be built and consolidated. By bottle-feeding, father and child can exchange looks and tame each other. By ensuring this basic need, the dad realizes that he has a role and a duty towards his child.
While some dads place a special emphasis on bottle feeding, others will focus on bathing, rocking the child or even falling asleep.
You will understand, there is therefore not just one gesture that helps develop the father-child relationship. There are no better gestures than others, it’s up to you to find the ones that speak to you the most and that promote the emergence of a bond with your child.